The First Impression is a Lasting Impression
The first date is the most apprehensive, nerve wreaking event in the beginning of any relationship and it is also the "first impression" and the one thing in life that can never be changed!
OK, so you have talked for months on the computer and on the phone, you have talked about childhood to adulthood, good and bad, past relationships, family and everything else in between and you think you really know this person and like them enough to meet them in person. The anticipation builds, you talk and you plan, where to go, what to do, what to wear, so many preparations to make a great impression and hopefully start a relationship that will last a lifetime.
In making that first impression, insure that you have been honest with this person and they have been honest with you, dishonesty does not a good relationship make. Talk to your new friend and discuss what you would like to do, where you would like to go, keeping the others likes and dislikes in mind. From that point try the following tips to plan an outing that is sure to be a pleasant time for both of you.
1. Whatever your plans are, have a backup plan in case of cancellation, closing or the weather.
2. Be punctual, plan a specific time and meeting place
3. Discuss the attire for your outing, nothing worse than showing up in a casual attire when your date is dressed more formal.
4. The first date should be short and informal, about 2 hours. If after 10 minutes your are cringing in your seat and realize this is not the one, you can cut it short and move on, however if you like them and it is going well, you can always extend the date.
5. Do not discuss or bad mouth past partners, talk about your interests, your job, hobbies, etc.
6. Limit alcohol or plan a date where alcohol is not available.
7. Plan your outing at a public venue so as not to intimidate or create an uncomfortable atmoshere.
8. Thank your friend for a wonderful time (regardless) and DO NOT say "I'll give you a call" if you do not intend to do so. If the meeting did not produce what you expected, be honest and tell them. Do not give someone false hope of a second date.
Enter this meeting with the idea that you have a new friend, and plan and execute the time based on that premise, if romance does not bloom, you still have a friend that you enjoyed talking to. Be conscientious and thoughtful, someday you could be on the other side of that coin and surely you would appreciate honesty as well. Have fun, be open to any possibility and rejection, it is all part of the cycle of life, enjoy the ride.
Dove is a 47 year old advice columnist who writes for Cupids Blackbook. She lives in the American Midwest.
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